I am the recipient of a lovely gift today.
Because I am no longer working (and really, can I just take a moment for a huge thank you to Hubby for easing my guilt about not finding another job right away and understanding that a mental/nervous/emotional breakdown takes different spans of recovery and for being the best supportive and all-around awesome dude? Thanks.) and because my Younger Daughter is away at the Institute of Secondary Knowledge and Social Hilarity, and because my Older Daughter has taken flight and is now in the Land of the Wearing of the Green and the Guinness and because Hubby has a meeting tonight, I will be all by myself this day, until roughly 10:30 this evening. You can’t see it, but I’m kind of squirming in my chair with delight.
It’s also raining. It’s a cold October rain which is the forerunner of a project nor’easter for today and tomorrow, and the skies are leaden and there’s soggy leaves all about the lawn and I don’t need to go anywhere. There’s a huge gift right there. I didn’t have to get up at Dark O’Clock and struggle with gloom and soggy and wild hair and grumpy commuters and I didn’t have to throw an apple and a cheesestick into my bag and secretly wish for mac and cheese instead.
Today my gift is a precious day of freedom. I am free to do what I want, when I want it, because nobody has requirements of me today. (Well, apart from the obvious of please not burning the house down, but I’m reasonably sure that’s safely on the list of things not to do today.) I will write, I will sip endless cups of tea, I will knit gifts for the gift-giving season soon upon us, I will watch Netflix and television and catch up on shows I have missed. I will eat what I want, when I want, and there just might be popcorn for dinner.
Although, part of me does feel a wee bit guilty. But I’m working on that, too.